Things to do at Changi Airport, Singapore

1) Hang out in the Orchid Garden. Chat to the Koi. Admire the finely-tuned orchid watering process: compressed water; fine, thin tube; tiny nozzle.

2) Contemplate paying S$30 for a three-hour nap. Decide against it.

3) Catch the beginning of a romantic-comedy exploring the ethics of guerilla film-making, starring Gael Garcia Bernal with a bad Brazilian accent, called Dot the I. Luxuriate in the comfy chairs and breezy coolness of the airport's free "passenger-only" mini-cinema.

4) Fall asleep, missing the denouement of the aforementioned movie, and wake up during a recent (read: bad) Woody Allen film in which Christina Ricci makes doe eyes at that guy from American Pie and Woody Allen thinks everyone is anti-semitic.

5) Stumble out onto the balcony, into the rooftop sunflower garden. Breathe in the warm, humid air. Marvel at the lush fringe of green enclosing the airport. try to remember the last time you saw so much green in the one place.

6) Eat a bowl of dhal and some hot, oily, charred naan. Decide the predominant reason for the crapness of aeroplane food is lack of naan.

7) Watch people jogging on the treadmill through the glass window of the gym.

8) Meditate in the Meditation and Prayer room.

9) Doze.

10) Snooze.

11) Realise that you snoozed through the only free bus tour of the city that would have fitted with your schedule.

12) Pretend to be filthy rich and browse nonchalently in Hermes and Prada. Nothing you haven't seen before.

13) Regret not wearing socks.

14) Surreptitiously sketch people who are asleep. They'll never know.

15) Detail the minutae of your daily life on your nascent, self-indulgent blog.